Inaugural post- welcome aboard!

[pfsb_cam]

First, there was NOTHING.

Then, it EXPLODED.

And then, there was a PARTY.


... essentially, the Big Bang has just come to pass, and there is already a place with a dance floor and music and a number of roving robotic waiters, and complicated mazes of pipes and bars overhead for flying and arboreal daemons to perch on, and an area with a swimming pool lit by multicolored pulsating lights for those with aquatic daemons, and... well, you get the idea. Welcome to the beginning of everything. Everyone and his/her/its daemon is welcome so long as they behave themselves. Enjoy!

Comments

[vance_prime]

Alyx just gives them a look that says no shit, Sherlock.

[boston_bruiser]

"Jesus, enough with the death glares," Voodoo mutters. "Christ, you'd think...aw, fuckit."

Maia picks it up. "What you're in right now is a bar, miss. No violence of any kind is permissible here. Believe me, if someone was going to take a shot at you, we would've seen them long before now."

Voodoo yawns, fiddles with the Tabasco bottle on the tabletop. "Yeah, your draw would've fuckin' sucked anyway."

[vance_prime]

"Excuse me?"

[boston_bruiser]

Voodoo looks at her. "Your draw. How you'd've gotten your pistol out of its holster. I can tell from your posture it would've been sloppy 'n slow as hell."

[vance_prime]

"I built this gun," says Alyx bluntly. "I think I know how to handle it better than you do."

[boston_bruiser]

Voodoo shrugs. "Maybe you do. But you don't know how to draw it right. Your right hand's near the butt, but your left's on the other side of your body. Bringing it over if you draw - that'll cost you, what, a half-second, a second?"

He shakes his head. "Like I said, slow." He places his left hand on his chest, directly across from the holster, and his right hand at his side. His pistol's out and ready in the blink of an eye. Pointed far away from any patrons, of course.

[vance_prime]

"Some of us," says Alyx, "don't rely exclusively on guns."

She rests her hand on her daemon's back as she says it.

[boston_bruiser]

Voodoo cocks an eyebrow. "Maia's a fucking honey badger. You think this does all the work?" he asks, nodding to the pistol as he holsters it.

[vance_prime]

"Sorry, is that supposed to impress me?"

In the absence of traditional schooling, Alyx has taught herself about the world by reading books and grilling her elders. Sadly, this did not include complete coverage of the wildlife of Africa and Asia.

[boston_bruiser]

"What, you've never heard of 'em? These guys," Voodoo says, nodding to Maia, "are the most fearless animals on the planet. They'll chase off predators big as your fuckin' tiger there, rip the gonads offa lions, crack open huge fuckin' beehives just to get at the maggots, and sleep off massive amounts of cobra venom like it's a fuckin' hangover. You'll see 'em fighting off packs of hyenas on their own and winning."

Maia gives the badger equivalent of a shrug. "We do that."

Voodoo leans back, sets his feet on the table. "So yeah, it's supposed to impress you."

[vance_prime]

"Uh-huh." If Alyx is impressed, he won't give Voodoo the satisfaction of seeing it. "You're one of those guys who just has to be the biggest badass in the room, aren't you."

[boston_bruiser]

Voodoo sighs and lays his head back, staring at the ceiling. "Lady, I ain't gotta prove shit. Been there, done that, did my time, got the fuckin' t-shirt and the jacket, however the fuck you wanna put it."

"Brian, calm down."

"Whatever. You gonna snark at me some more now?"

[vance_prime]

"No, but I am going to ask for an actual explanation of where the hell we are and how the hell I got here," she replies. "It wasn't a portal storm. We haven't had one of those in a decade. So what was it?"

[boston_bruiser]

Voodoo sighs and looks up at the ceiling. "Mai?"

"As far as we can tell, you're in a pan-dimensional bar at the beginning of the universe," the honey badger says. "It's all right there," she says, nodding to the Window. "As for how you got here...that's a bit trickier. Unless you walked through a door - which I doubt, given your description of events - our best guess is spontaneous teleportation."

[vance_prime]

"And, again, we haven't had a portal storm in a decade, so how is that possible?"

[boston_bruiser]

"How the fuck should we know, lady?" Voodoo says. "We've been here for a couple days and we still haven't figured this place out."

"If you want to get back to your world, there's the door," Maia says, nodding to it. "That seems to work for most people. Ours is still locked."

[vance_prime]

Alyx gives the door a decidedly dubious look, but walks over to it anyway. (The tiger remains rooted on the spot, watching Voodoo and Maia.)

[boston_bruiser]

Maia returns the tiger's gaze, while Voodoo...

"What's your beef?"

...well.

[vance_prime]

The tiger doesn't say a word. (Kei is remarkably laconic even by daemon standards.)

Meanwhile, Alyx opens the door... peeks out... shuts it for a moment, then opens it again...

"What. The. Hell."

[boston_bruiser]

"I told you."

"Actually, I did."

"Whatever."

[vance_prime]

Finally, she turns back. "Okay. You said you don't know how this works. I don't suppose you could point me toward someone who does?"

[boston_bruiser]

Voodoo points to a blonde, broken-nosed guy standing alongside a massive polar bear. "That's the guy. 'parently him 'n his brothers made it as a birthday present for dear old mom." He snorts. "I'd've gotten her a card and some flowers, but whatever."